insanity

Is this how it feels to be depressed? Waking up each morning disappointed that its another day of constant battles forcing yourself to keep a positive mind. You try to sleep in hoping that another day has gone by. You are no longer hungry regardless how little you have eaten. No motivation to do anything nor energy to get you moving. How does it feel? How does it feel when your whole world collapse and there is no way of replenishing it and building it back up? Shall you just move on and walk over all the rumbles or should you start picking up the pieces and putting it back together with what is left.. Each day I pray for a miracle, for a change to happen in my life and not one things has been what I imagined it to be. It seems as if things are coming to it’s worst, things are not at my grasp. I’m loosing everything. My life, my state of mind, my relationship, just everything. I have never felt such emptiness or be on the verge of crying every single minute. I want to let out and get rid of this burden I carry upon my shoulders. Set it free and live again. I walk through the shadows alone with no one to guide me. With a house full of people and a family to love, I still feel every loneliness inside of me. Why has it come to this? How have I let something so rotten become the root of my stability? The one thing that mattered most to me, destruct my optimism..my strive to conquer, my hope to happiness. I guess that’s what I get for revolving my whole world to ones happiness and forgetting about my own.

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